i don't know that awkwardness can be avoided if we want to do something different from the default. for some people, saying "she" when referring to A will be awkward. "they" would be awkward, too, and probably more so, just because of the implicit number. english pronouns are just poorly suited to the task of referring to a person who does not fit neatly into one of two predetermined gender categories. i think that's what we are trying to change, if even in a small way.

the only way to get beyond something being awkward is for people to do it enough that it becomes familiar and, hopefully, comfortable. at this point, all pronouns are awkward, because they presume a gender or number that is not appropriate. of course, one option is to simply stop using pronouns, but that is also against the default.

i think the idea here is to distribute the awkwardness. if A's friends make a consistent and public effort to change the default, then we all take on some of the awkwardness and help others see that their presumption that the masculine default is appropriate is unwarranted and should be reconsidered. it's not a perfect solution, but i don't know that there is one. it just seems like we have to do *something,* because A is unhappy and doing nothing (or at least nothing consistent and collective) doesn't seem to be changing that.