I feel like I'm in a position of needing to acquire knowledge that I'm not sure I know how to get. My (limited) exposure tends to suggest that it's structural, and cannot, perhaps will not, be dispersed without a wholesale submission to the structure. This causes me problems, and I'm not sure how much is valid and how much is stubbornness and arrogance on my part.
I don't learn structurally well, and I tend to be resentful in the process. I don't take things as true just because I'm told them by someone in positional authority (in fact, I'm more likely to question or resist if knowledge is imparted with an appeal to positional authority). Despite an incredible streak of antiauthoritarianism, I don't think any form of meaningful knowledge can be successfully transmitted in a "one size fits all" method. My epistemology informs my view of power dynamics, and vice versa.
But I still need to know things, and the pressure to know is only growing. I don't want to feel like I have to reinvent the wheel, unless knowledge of the wheel is only transmitted after several years of study of wood grain and grease viscosity. With my luck, my self made wheel would explode. It's not that I want the milk for free, but I don't want to pay for a cow if I only need a little milk. Honestly, though, I guess I don't know what I need, other than something.
I don't learn structurally well, and I tend to be resentful in the process. I don't take things as true just because I'm told them by someone in positional authority (in fact, I'm more likely to question or resist if knowledge is imparted with an appeal to positional authority). Despite an incredible streak of antiauthoritarianism, I don't think any form of meaningful knowledge can be successfully transmitted in a "one size fits all" method. My epistemology informs my view of power dynamics, and vice versa.
But I still need to know things, and the pressure to know is only growing. I don't want to feel like I have to reinvent the wheel, unless knowledge of the wheel is only transmitted after several years of study of wood grain and grease viscosity. With my luck, my self made wheel would explode. It's not that I want the milk for free, but I don't want to pay for a cow if I only need a little milk. Honestly, though, I guess I don't know what I need, other than something.