(no subject)
Jul. 2nd, 2002 11:38 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
adrienmundiI am a monumental dumb ass sometimes, and this is one of those times.
I am inexperienced in expressing myself physically. I tend to feel physically inept at most things, unless they involve inflicting some sort of damage on others, myself, or both. I am acutely aware of being quite a bit taller than most. I am unusually strong for my build (I don't think that's ego; it wouldn't make sense for it to be). I tend to feel uncomfortable in my body unless doing tasks that require endurance or strength.
I am also not very good at expressing myself emotionally, or basically any way other than intellectually/verbally. While I think I feel deeply, maybe even passionately, I don't know how to get any of that out of me.
Of course, my gender problems come into play, as well, in this as in just about every other damned thing. Mostly because of my size, strength, etc., I feel that in just about every physical encounter I am in, I am necessarily gendered: by others, by myself.
The dumb assedness comes into play with my most wonderful, amazing, and exemplary SO. Because of my inexperience, ineptitude, and issues, I end up causing inadvertent distress to the one person for whom distress is the absolute last thing I wish.
I am inexperienced in expressing myself physically. I tend to feel physically inept at most things, unless they involve inflicting some sort of damage on others, myself, or both. I am acutely aware of being quite a bit taller than most. I am unusually strong for my build (I don't think that's ego; it wouldn't make sense for it to be). I tend to feel uncomfortable in my body unless doing tasks that require endurance or strength.
I am also not very good at expressing myself emotionally, or basically any way other than intellectually/verbally. While I think I feel deeply, maybe even passionately, I don't know how to get any of that out of me.
Of course, my gender problems come into play, as well, in this as in just about every other damned thing. Mostly because of my size, strength, etc., I feel that in just about every physical encounter I am in, I am necessarily gendered: by others, by myself.
The dumb assedness comes into play with my most wonderful, amazing, and exemplary SO. Because of my inexperience, ineptitude, and issues, I end up causing inadvertent distress to the one person for whom distress is the absolute last thing I wish.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2002-07-03 08:34 am (UTC)I´m just telling you not to worry yourself to death.. if he cares he´ll know.
*hugs*
no subject
Date: 2002-07-03 08:41 am (UTC)